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Seating Divorced Parents


My parents divorced recently.  I'm not sure where they should be seated during the ceremony.  Neither have remarried, and they are on speaking terms.  My dad is going to walk me down the aisle.  When he sits down, do they sit together or on different pews?  Also, when the pastor asks, "who gives this woman to be married to this man," can he still say, "her mother and I," or does he have to say, "I do", since they are divorced?

Anna H.

Dear Anna:

It is certainly proper for your father to sit on the front pew with your mother, following his walking you down the aisle.  When neither parent has remarried and they are on good terms, their sitting together shows a mutual relationship and united front in wishing you a lifetime of love and happiness.

If it happens they would prefer not to sit together, then the parent you are not living with would sit on the second or third pew behind the parent you are living with.  If you are living with neither parent, it is usually the mother of the bride who is seated on the front pew and the father who sits behind.   As a matter of interest, although it is not the case in your situation, when a parent has remarried, their new spouse is seated with them.

In answer to your question concerning your father's response to the question of "who gives this woman to be married to this man?", it is correct either way he chooses to answer.    More appropriately, it is correct either way "you" choose to ask him to answer. 



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